Derek Holland drives dune buggy straight out of Tupac’s Compton apocalypse

And you thought Roy Halladay drove a sweet ride to work. Left-handed weather man Derek Holland of the Texas Rangers blows the bullpen doors off Doc’s hot rod with this dune buggy that appears to have been driven directly off the set of Tupac Shakur’s epic “California Love” video.

T.R. Sullivan of MLB.com snapped the main photo above of an automobile called a Ranger (naturally) RZR S. It’s good for driving in the ruggedly arid terrain of the White Tank Mountains near Rangers camp in Surprise, Ariz. — which Holland frequently does. But to work? Holland says the car is “perfectly legal” to drive on the street because “it has license plates.” If you say so, Dutch.

It’s a two-seater, so Holland can take a teammate with him. Pitcher Cody Eppley rode along to camp on Tuesday and has been up in the mountains with him. But Eppley made it clear that riding with Holland is perfectly safe.

“We’re not stupid,” Eppley said. “It’s just nice to get out and see the mountains and the White Tanks and get away from everything.”

This vehicle really would be handy in case of the apocalypse, which Tupac predicted in the dystopian-themed video for his biggest hit:

Now let me welcome everybody to the wild, wild west. It appears the forecast for tomorrow is sandy, with a chance of Dr. Dre eye patch. Considering the song is Tupac’s love letter to his home state, isn’t Holland’s buggy better off being used by the Los Angeles Angels? Does Erick Aybar drive something with a roll bar?

Spring Training has arrived! Follow Dave on Twitter — @AnswerDave — and engage The Stew on Facebook for your fill of Grapefruit and Cactus!

Denard Robinson shows his accuracy hasn’t improved this offseason

Poor Denard Robinson.

Also season he faced a lot of criticism because of his lack of accuracy. It didn’t matter that he helped take Michigan to the Sugar Bowl — its first BCS bowl since 2006 — and beat Virginia Tech 23-20 in overtime. Nope, Michigan fans (and probably its coaches) wanted to see Robinson improve upon his 55 percent completion rate and maybe cut his 15 interceptions in half.

Unfortunately, nearly two months removed from the BCS game, Robinson’s accuracy hasn’t gotten any better.

During ESPN’s college basketball Gameday at Michigan last Saturday, the crew asked Robinson to throw a football through a basketball hoop from one end of the court to the other — about a 30-yard pass. And, spoiler alert, he missed.

His first attempt was the closest, the next two were ugly and the final attempt, he tucked, ran up the court and then flubbed a potential layup or dunk – a couple times. It was an all-around embarrassing effort for the Wolverines’ starter.

Even host Rece Davis was kind of taunting Robinson saying, “There’s no Junior Hemmingway out there Denard, you’ve got to put it on line.”

Perhaps Robinson needs to call former BYU quarterback and current Kansas transfer Jake Heaps for pointers. Heaps threw a football into the basket from the stands last year during a promo with Jimmer Fredette last year.

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Graham Watson is on Facebook and Twitter: Follow her @Yahoo_Graham

Create-a-Caption: Roy Halladay’s classic hot rod

Pitchers and catchers are reporting all over Florida and Arizona this weekend, but it’s hard to imagine anyone making a cooler arrival than Roy Halladay. The Philadelphia Phillies ace sped into Clearwater on Saturday in a classic hot rod and, according to Matt Gelb of the Philadelphia Inquirer, the throwback pitcher enjoys restoring throwback cars about as much as he enjoys dominating the National League. (Check out the grin on his face, because it’s possible it’s the last time you’ll see one from him all year.)

So have at it, amateur Internet copy editors of the world. How should this caption read?

Follow the jump for winners from our last C-a-C, featuring new Brewer, Barack Obama:

President Obama joins the Brewers

1st — BaseballFuries. “So Mr. President, we have a 50 game tryout, just for you …”

2nd — Tyler. “Don’t worry about the cost of this custom embroidered jersey, Mister President. I saved a lot of money over the past year after taking away collective bargaining rights of Wisconsin’s public employees.”

3rd — Al. “Bad news Mr. President, here’s your new jersey and approval rating.”

HM — Mike E. “We unretired George Washington’s number for you.”

HM— Vaffanculo. “Instead of arbitration, Obama and Walker decide on a beer summit to settle their differences.”

Greetings from Florida: Let Spring Swing V begin!

CLEARWATER, Fla. — Spring Training can’t officially start until somebody’s adorable puppy dog makes off with a batting practice baseball. Congratulations to this guy, a French Bulldog belonging to right-hander Tanner Scheppers of the Texas Rangers, for kicking off the 2012 season.

Welcome to another Spring Swing with the Stew, our fifth tour of camps around major league baseball. I’m starting on the Gulf Coast of Florida with the Philadelphia Phillies, winners of 102 games during the 2011 regular season and not enough games come playoff time. The Phillies should still be the favorites in the NL East and to get to the World Series, but they also come with some doubt.

• How will they do without slugger Ryan Howard, who is recovering from from Achilles’ tendon surgery? And when will he return? In May, like the club hopes, or later? And will he be worth the enormous contract extension that starts this season? Is old friend/new guy Jim Thome really up to playing defense even once a week?

• How much of the load can Hunter Pence carry? (Get it?)

• Will the unsettled contract situation of Cole Hamels linger?

• Will the back of the rotation — Joe Blanton, Vance Worley, Kyle Kendrick — even begin to keep up with the best 1-2-3 in the majors?

• Can Chase Utley rebound from chronic injuries and hit like a middle-of-the-order guy again?

• Will the rest of the bullpen effectively set up new closer Jonathan Papelbon?

• How old is too old for Placido Polanco?

• What in the heck is going on out in left field?

And there’s more! That’s a lot of questions for what’s supposed to be the best team in the league. Join me and ‘Duk as we cover the Grapefruit and Cactus leagues in search of the answers. We’ll be somewhere new (pretty much) every day until the season starts.

Spring Training has arrived!
Follow Dave on Twitter — @AnswerDave — and engage The Stew on Facebook for your fill of Grapefruit and Cactus!

Ask Alex: Can Prince Fielder and Miguel Cabrera combine for 80 homers?

We all have questions about the 2012 season and Alex Remington luckily has some answers. The Stew’s resident stats guru will address some of the big ones as the year progresses.

The Situation: After three months of waiting, the second-best free agent on the market signed the second-biggest deal of the offseason. Everyone knew that Prince Fielder would get paid, but few guessed that he would wind up with the Detroit Tigers, where his father became the highest-paid player in baseball. Few also guessed that he’d get nine years and $214 million, which struck most outside observers as a premium the Tigers might come to regret paying.

For now, though, every other team in the AL Central is quaking in its shoes. Fielder can mash, and Cabrera is as devastating a hitter as there is in baseball. (Since 2009, Cabrera actually has a higher wOBA than Albert Pujols, .422 to .418.) Over their combined 16 years in baseball, they have combined for 507 homers.

The Question: Can Prince Fielder and Miguel Cabrera combine for 80 homers in 2012?

The Analysis: Prince Fielder and Miguel Cabrera are two of the best hitters in baseball, and both have hit a lot of home runs in their career, so it’s understandable to think that the sky’s the limit for their combined offensive potential. Cabrera is one of the few hitters in baseball who might actually be better than Ryan Braun, and the two are probably the best offensive one-two punch in the game. Fielder’s career high in homers is 50 (from 2007), and Cabrera’s is 38 (from 2010).

But I don’t think that they can even approach 80 homers together this year. Here’s why.

First of all, Miguel Cabrera has never hit 40 homers. In 2011, while he led the majors in batting average (.344) and doubles (48), he had his lowest homer total in six years, hitting just 30 — despite setting a career high with 161 games played. Fielder hit 50 in 2007 and 46 in 2009, but last year he hit 38 and in 2010 he hit 32. Considering their recent efforts, Fielder and Cabrera’s best hope for 80 would not be for both of them to hit 40, but for Fielder to hit 45 and Cabrera to hit 35.

Even still, that’s going to be hard for Prince to do. Forty-homer seasons are just a lot rarer than they used to be, now that we’re in the post-steroid era. Over the past 10 seasons, there were 63 different 40-homer seasons. Only four of them occurred in the last two years. So there is just less offense these days.

For example, in 2007, NL hitters bashed 2,705 homers in 100,796 plate appearances: hitters homered in 2.7 percent of their plate appearances. In 2011, NL hitters poked 2,281 dingers in 99,774 plate appearances, just a 2.3 percent home run rate. To put that in perspective, that would mean that Prince’s 38 homers in 2011 were worth about 45 homers in 2007. Worse, Comerica Park in Detroit is simply a worse place to hit a home run than Miller Park in Milwaukee. In each of the last three years, by ESPN’s Park Factors, Miller Park has tended to increase numbers from homerun hitters while Comerica has tended to decrease them.

The major projection systems agree that Fielder and Cabrera will pull up short. CAIRO sees 34 from Fielder and 32 from Cabrera, while ZiPS projects 37 from Fielder and 31 from Cabrera. (The ZiPS Fielder projection was made before he signed in Detroit, so it might be slightly lower now, due to the park factor.) The Bill James Handbook, which is almost always the most optimistic projection, forecasts 38 from Fielder and 35 from Cabrera.

Also, many people seem to think that having Cabrera in the lineup will increase Fielder’s homer totals, or that having Fielder in the lineup will increase Cabrera’s homer totals. Don’t believe it. Numerous baseball researchers have attempted to find systematic evidence that hitter protection actually increases production — that having an amazing cleanup hitter actually improves the No. 3 hitter’s results, or vice versa — and have failed. JC Bradbury and Will Carroll are two of the most recent. Being next to one another in the lineup may decrease intentional walk totals, but it won’t hugely affect their offense.

The Forecast for 2012: The projection systems believe that Cabrera and Fielder’s combined homers will top out around 70, and that’s my prediction, too. (I’ll say that they’ll hit about 35 and 34, respectively.) They’ll still have a smashing offense, and the Tigers are clearly the team to beat in the AL Central. But as gifted as Fielder and Cabrera are, they still have their limits. And 80 combined home runs is almost certainly above that limit.

Other Ask Alex questions for 2012
• Can Jose Reyes repeat as NL batting champ?
• Will Julio Teheran or Matt Moore win rookie of the year?
• Will Alex Avila be an All-Star again?
• Can Michael Pineda keep his ERA under 4 in the AL East?
• Can Adam Dunn return to 30 home run territory?
• Can Jason Heyward return to his rookie form?
• Can Matt Kemp go 50/50?

Puck Daddy Reader Art Contest: Create a cheesy 1990s-style NHL Player Poster

How does an NHL player know that he’s “made it” as a professional? When he holds his first hockey card? When he wins the Stanley Cup? When he gets his first no-trade clause?

For many years, success might have been measured like this:

Yes, having a photographer pose you in a goofy outfit for a poster that shared bedroom wall-space with Kathy Ireland in a swimsuit and the Ultimate Warrior was, in fact, career validation in the 1990s.

Alas, this cheese-tastic tradition appears to have gone the way of Starter jackets and Startling Lineup figures… which is where you come in.

Presenting our latest Puck Daddy Reader Art Contest: Create a Cheesy NHL Player Poster.

It’s a classic PD Photoshop contest. Using Ray Bourque and Peter Forsberg as your muses, create player posters that capture the essence of an NHLer past or present. Maybe through a nickname or this reputation or a moment of infamy. We’re looking for the most hilarious, creative and puckhead-smart posters; ones we’d proudly waste the Fun-Tack on to hang on our rec room.

Prizes? Oy, always with the prizes. Well, we’re proud to announce a partnership with Heritage Hockey for this and other contests this year.

Heritage Hockey is home of Team Canada 1972 and your destination for hockey memorabilia. First Place prize for this contest: A Team Canada 1972 road jersey and a DVD copy of “’72 From Training Camp To Victory.” We’ll have additional NHL related prizes for the runners-up. Now head over to Facebook and “like” these guys for us.

Enter as often as you’d like (PG-13 Content Warning, as always). The deadline for submissions is Thursday, Feb. 23 at 6 p.m. EST/3 p.m. PST. Email your entries to puckdaddyblog@yahoo.com, or hit us with any questions.

Good luck, godspeed and we can’t wait to see the best of your worst.

New Mexico finally secures quality win, likely locks Mountain West in as three-bid league

On the surface, entering Wednesday night’s crucial clash with 13th-ranked San Diego State, New Mexico looked like a strong candidate for an at-large NCAA tournament bid.

By coming away with a much-needed 77-67 win on the road against No. 13 San Diego State, the Lobos locked the Mountain West in as a three-bid league (… and with Colorado State losing at Boise State two hours after Wyoming fell at home to Air Force on Wednesday, the MWC will likely be just that — a three-bid league.)

More important for the time being, though, is that the Lobos, the preseason pick to win the league, is all alone atop the MWC standings until at least Saturday.

The Lobos currently stand at 21-4 overall and 7-2 in the Mountain West. Behind them by a game now are SDSU and 11th-ranked UNLV, each at 6-3.

The Rebels travel to Albuquerque for a Saturday morning showdown. If New Mexico successfully avenges an 80-63 loss in Las Vegas from back on Jan. 21, it will hold a commanding two-game edge on UNLV. A loss would likely mean the league’s top three teams are again locked into a first-place tie.

But no matter where it finishes in the Mountain West race, New Mexico can take solace in the fact that it is finally playing like the team everyone it expected it to be.

Given their underwhelming non-conference schedule, the Lobos had little margin for error before league play. Instead, they dropped a home game to New Mexico State and a neutral site contest to Santa Clara. Combined with a home loss to San Diego State and the lopsided defeat in Vegas, New Mexico headed to Viejas Arena on Wednesday with a shiny 20-4 record without much substance behind it in terms of quality wins.

That is no longer an issue.

To go with an RPI of 32 and the inside track to a regular season league title is a signature win over the Aztecs.

Preseason MWC Player of the Year Drew Gordon posted 17 points and 17 rebounds, while preseason all-Mountain West selection Kendall Williams scored a game-high 21 points off of 5-of-6 3-point shooting.

Hitting five of six treys won’t happen every night, but Williams has surged during the Lobos’ current six-game winning streak, and keeping his confident, productive play going the rest of the way might determine just how far New Mexico’s ride goes.

During the Lobos’ current streak, he’s shooting 64.6 percent from the floor, 52.9 percent from long range and has an assist-to-turnover ratio of 2.6.

For the better part of the season, Williams, who finished his freshman year on a tear, struggled to fill the shoes of departed senior point guard Dairese Gary, who for four years was an extension of coach Steve Alford on the floor and one of college basketball’s elite leaders.

He’s playing as confident as he has at any point in his brief college career, and by coming through with a monster performance on Wednesday, he likely secured himself to do so for the first time in the NCAA tournament next month.

Ryan Greene also covers UNLV and the Mountain West Conference for RunRebs.com. Follow him on Twitter at @ryanmgreene.

More from Yahoo! Sports: St. Joe’s coach pulls prank

Nevin Shapiro is determined to bring down the Miami football program

Nevin Shapiro, the former Miami booster who orchestrated a $930 million Ponzi scheme, isn’t done with his allegations and rants against the University of Miami athletic department and is determined to see several players pay for what he determines to be a betrayal against him.

“I’m more of a victim than a Ponzi schemer and assailant,” Shapiro wrote in an email to the Miami Herald.

Shapiro told Yahoo! Sports in August that he provided extra benefits, including meals, prostitutes and trips to Shapiro’s million-dollar Miami Beach mansion, to 72 Miami student-athletes and provided the financial documents and sources to back up his claims. The story took 11 months to report.

[Video: Jerry Sandusky's wife tries to run down reporter]

While the NCAA remains mum on its ongoing investigation, Shapiro continues to light fires in an attempt to burn the entire athletic department down.

“The public is going to hate me worse in the next coming months,” Shapiro wrote in numerous e-mails to the Miami Herald over the past few months. “It’s going to be severe and catastrophic. My feelings are getting inflamed and I’m going to pop off pretty soon with regards to them and the NCAA. I’m coming for them both [UM and former players] and I’m going to be successful.

“I’m taking that program down to Chinatown and the former players and links to that program. Why? Because the U.S. government lined up 47 former players to testify against me in open court if I went to trial. That in itself is motivation to shove it up their collective [butts].”

Yeah, Shapiro really did say he was going to take “that program down to Chinatown” just in case you thought it might be a misprint.

Shapiro also claims that, “UM is getting the death penalty or damn close to it.”

Despite Shapiro’s threats, Miami doesn’t seem to be rattled. According to the Miami Herald, the university is fairly confident that that NCAA will dismiss Shapiro’s claims that cannot be corroborated. Why is the university so confident? Because the NCAA hasn’t even contacted several of the players Shapiro named in his allegations and those who have been contacted deny any wrongdoing. Miami is confident that the most it will get is a one- or two-year bowl ban and a loss of scholarships.

[Related: New NCAA rule proposes radical changes to kickoffs, touchbacks]

Shapiro claims there are more severe allegations that have not yet come out, but no one knows what they are and they could just be a sad scare tactic by a desperate and jailed man. No matter what Shapiro says or does, he’s required to serve 85 percent of his sentence — 17 years — but it’s clear he’s looking for company.

Yahoo! Sports initial report of Shapiro’s involvement with Miami painted a pretty clear picture of lack of institutional control, so if he has something worse to add to it, Miami could be involved in one of the worse scandals in college football history.

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Graham Watson is on Facebook and Twitter: Follow her @Yahoo_Graham

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Ahmad Bradshaw says Cowboys won’t win with Tony Romo at QB

Ahmad Bradshaw is still enjoying the glow of his Super Bowl win, but that didn’t keep him from dropping some advice to the New York Giants’ division rivals, the Dallas Cowboys. His words of wisdom? Find some confidence and drop that Tony Romo fella. Otherwise, they won’t win a championship.

“I don’t see it happening,” Bradshaw told the NFL Network when asked if the Cowboys will ever win a Super Bowl with Romo at the helm. “I don’t think they believe it, and they’re America’s Team. If America don’t believe it . . .”

Bradshaw was asked to clear his comment, about whether he was referring to the team itself or the fans.

“It all comes together,” Bradshaw said. “If the fans don’t believe it, the team doesn’t. They’re kinda doubtful with Romo.”

It would be best for the Giants if the Cowboys kept everything as is. Since the Giants beat the Cowboys on the way to their Super Bowl win in 2008, the Giants have owned the Cowboys. In eight match-ups, Dallas has won just twice.

The Romo-led Cowboys, on the other hand, have struggled. They haven’t been to the postseason since the 2009 season, when they were bounced by Brett Favre’s Minnesota Vikings. Their 8-8 season in 2011 can’t be blamed all on Romo, who threw for 4,184 yards. What Bradshaw is talking about is a lack of belief in the team across the program, which starts much higher than Romo.

How Mats Sundin’s no-trade clause controversy made fans reconsider loyalty in NHL

Loyalty is a product of perception. It can be gauged — how far one needs to go to reach self-satisfactory fulfillment, how much is demanded from someone to prove its existence — and it has its limitations.

Mats Sundin was loyal to the Toronto Maple Leafs. He wanted to win a Stanley Cup for the city and its fans. He wanted nothing more than to achieve that honor as a Leaf, playing amongst friends.

Toronto was six points out of a playoff spot at the 2008 NHL Trade Deadline. Had they qualified for the tournament, it wouldn’t have been as a team with a realistic shot at the championship. They needed to reload and rebuild. The best way to kickstart that process? Trading one of the top scorers of the last 18 years to a contender for a package of picks and prospects.

Only Mats Sundin didn’t want to go, and had a no-trade clause that allowed him to reject any deal.

Sundin’s number will be honored Saturday night at Air Canada Centre, becoming the 16th individual in franchise history to have a banner in the rafters. It’s a time to remember the Hall of Fame career he put together in Toronto. It’s also time to remember that he was loyal to a fault.

In Feb. 2008, the 37-year-old center was asked by GM Cliff Fletcher for a list of teams as trade destinations. TSN’s Darren Dreger reported that suitors like the Detroit Red Wings, San Jose Sharks, Anaheim Ducks and Vancouver Canucks were lining up for him; the Montreal Canadiens and Ottawa Senators were also in the mix.

Sundin refused to waive. Here’s a sense of the media swarm that caused:

The criticism arrived swiftly, especially from those outside of Toronto. From a plucky columnist named Wyshynski on AOL FanHouse:

Should the Leafs even welcome him back? Sundin has placed his own personal comfort ahead of self-sacrifice for the franchise he so dearly adores. The asking price was only going to rise as Tuesday’s deadline grew near; there’s no telling what improvements to next year’s Leafs their captain just pissed away because of his nihilism toward the “concept of a rental player.” Ice Junkies believes this decision is the epitome of class; I couldn’t disagree more.

From a slightly more caustic Scott Burnside of ESPN:

Fletcher should immediately strip Sundin of the captain’s C. Then, Fletcher should make it very clear he will not re-sign the unrestricted free agent this summer or strongly recommend to the next full-time GM that Sundin not be re-signed.

After all, what kind of role model is Sundin if he refuses to commit the ultimate act of leadership by helping the team he professes to love get better? What kind of leader would prefer not to go to a contender and stay with a team that has no hope to make the playoffs and is already in a much-publicized rebuilding phase? Is this a hockey leader, a player worthy of the captaincy, or is this a man who simply enjoys the prospect of an early trip to his cottage or vacation in Spain every April? Think that’s harsh? Get over it.

The Leafs captain had suddenly be recast as selfish. This label was superficially reinforced over the next few months, as Sundin dithered about his hockey future before joining the Vancouver Canucks for a inconsequential career coda.

Sundin was given a no-trade clause, and had every right to spike a trade request. But this wasn’t Dany Heatley dictating his future with an NTC because he didn’t give a rat’s ass about that the Senators were getting back for him. This was a player that professed loyalty and love to a franchise, and then refused to help that franchise at the end of his playing days because “I just don’t think I can go to another team if I don’t want to play for another team.”

It was a moment in which the concept of loyalty was blurred for many in the NHL.

Had he earned the right to say “no”? Was it hypocritical to trumpet one’s dedication to the franchise and then not assist it with an act of self-sacrifice? “I understand the business part of it,” said Sundin; did he?

Today, as his number ascends to the rafters, Sundin has reflected on all of this. From the CP:

“My strength and maybe my weakness is that I’m a loyal guy,” the former Leafs captain said Friday. “I felt that you spend so much time in an organization and in Toronto, I always saw myself winning the Stanley Cup in Toronto. I wanted to do that and also (realized) it would never feel the same doing it somewhere else.”

From the Globe & Mail:

“When you’re 22 or 23, it’s kind of just about winning the championship,” Sundin said. “And as you grow older, it’s a cliché, but you’re enjoying the journey, the travel and the grind of getting together as a group in the fall and just build up for a goal in the spring. It was kind of the thing that was great, the long-term commitment.”

Perhaps that was the great misconception about Mats Sundin’s loyalty.

It was to the fans, to the city, and the “group building up for a goal in the spring.” It wasn’t to management, or the players wearing the Leaf after Sundin was no longer on his journey.

Some fans, most media and Leafs management perceived that his loyalty should include an appetite to help rebuild a franchise he proudly led for 13 seasons.

Mats Sundin perceived loyalty, and commitment, quite differently. And his legacy with the Leafs will forever carry that awkward footnote.